Sunday, 15 July 2012

Men!

I think the entire female population will agree with me when I say that men can drive a person absolutely insane!

We sit here waiting for you to text us, call us, mention us or even just look at us - desperately hoping that you might actually take a second out of your lives to think about us. And the longer you make us wait, the more power you have over us, or so you think!

What you don’t realize is that we too have busy lives, we have friends and families and hobbies and if it were up to me, you wouldn’t even exist! Men are completely replaceable and the sooner they realize that, the better their chances are of not being replaced.

You see, due to modern science and technologies woman are able to complete all the necessary functions of life without men. Women can reproduce without men. Women can succeed without men. Women have always been able to raise families without the aid of men. Truth be told we don’t need you lot for anything.

In fact, the modern vibrator means that we don’t even need you for pleasure!

Sure, we won’t be able to dance with men, but we prefer a night out with the girls anyway. We’ll have to open our own doors and carry our own bags but I’m sure we could handle it. And we wouldn’t have to deal with those dirty old men leering at us while trying to slide their hands up our skirts for a feel of our knickers.


Well, maybe not. Maybe our lives wouldn’t be better without men. Maybe I’m just ranting because I’m upset. Maybe I’m one of those really fat chicks who is too lazy to get my ass off to a gym and sort myself out, so I have decided to blame men for all my misfortunes. Maybe I’ve taken too much crap from too many men and now I’ve decided that all men are the same.

The truth is that when you have feelings for a guy he has the ability to drive you to distraction. You sit there trying to decipher whether he feels the same. You read and reread all his texts, you try and remember every word he’s said to you all in the hopes of being able to figure out how he feels. But no matter how many times you read those texts you’re not going to know the truth until he makes his move.

So, all you can do is get on with your life and wait for him to say something, or do something, because truth be told, up until that exact moment you’re actually completely clueless. The sooner we admit that to ourselves the sooner we’ll be able to enjoy the feeling that he gives us.

Either that or we kill the lot of them!!!

1 comment:

  1. Make a move on him ... no reason you can't. He is probably (maybe, or maybe not) just as distracted by you!

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