Goodbyes

Being away from the people we love is one of the most difficult things to face in our lives. Sometimes we can't be with those people because they've passed away and others its because they've moved away. If we're lucky then they are only leaving for a short while. It is easier to say "goodbye for now" than it is to say "goodbye."

This year has held many goodbyes for me. Some of them were only for now, but two very important people left my life this year.

The first is my ex boyfriend. Now usually, relationships end because something happened and the relationship no longer works, however in this case the relationship ended purely because he was moving away. The problem with relationships ending in this way is that you have no reason to want to get over the person. In fact, in my case, I didn't want to move on, but you have too. You don't have an option. It's difficult.

The second was my dad. Boy's need their dad's so that they have someone to teach them the ways of life and have someone to look up to. Girl's need their dad's to protect them. Dad's are the barriers we have between reality and our easily broken hearts. They give us the advice we need for life and love. Most importantly they are their to hold your hand when you cross the street.

My dad and I were never very close. I loved him, but we didn't have much of a relationship. Or so I thought at the time. I didn't realize how much he meant to me until he was't there anymore and suddenly when something was wrong I had no one to call. The thing protecting me from "the real world" was gone. My life changed in an instant.

I guess we always know that eventually we're going to have to say goodbye but, as far as I was concerned, my dad was indestructable! He was my hero. Nothing could touch him. He truly was an amazing man. He was much more impressive than most men and was respected by many. I thought he was invincible.

When I realized he wasn't it broke my heart. I was in shock. And I had no idea how I was going to survive.

Four months later and I'm still alive. I miss him every day, but I'm alive. I have had the most amazing support from family and friends. It is still horrible to think about and hurts more than I knew possible. The thing about goodbyes is that sometimes, you don't even get to say them. Make sure you always say exactly what you need to because there will come a time when you won't be able to anymore.