In nature, animals are born under varying circumstances. Some are born in luscious green fields with food and water available at every whim. Other animals are born in less favourable conditions and often find themselves starving or dehydrated. Irrelevant of their circumstances, only the fittest can survive! Evolve, or die.
This however, is not present in the world of humans.
Yes, some of us are born under more favourable conditions and have wealthier families, better schools and can afford more luxuries whilst others are born into poverty stricken homes where the prospect of attending a school is only a slight possibility and even then it’s generally a bad school with no text books, no desks and under qualified teachers. This is unfortunate and I sympathize with those who aren’t currently sitting in an air-conditioned room in front of some of the latest computer technology.
However, irrespective of our childhoods only the fittest can survive. There are a limited number of universities that have to limit their student base by picking only the cream of the crop. However, this is not the case anymore. It is not a case of choosing only the best and brightest minds but also sticking to a government quota in the hopes of getting government subsidies for the extreme costs of running a university.
This does lead to some of the best and brightest not getting into the courses that they wanted to do at the University of their choice. However a bright student cannot evolve into the relevant quota group simply by wishing to do so. A black man cannot become a Chinese woman out of mere will.
This quota serves to level out the playing ground. It gives those who grew up in poverty more of a chance in life while simultaneously bringing those who have had it easy back down to the ground. And so, you would think the playing ground was level. We go through university and come out with the same degree as everyone else in our class.
It is then time to apply for a job. We all have the same degree and should therefore all have the required level of competence. Why then, do companies also have to have a quota? Once again this quota is applied and females get preference over males whilst blacks get preference over whites and people with disabilities get preference over everyone else (provided it meets safety requirements). Now the playing field is uneven once more. Although those who are now ahead are generally those who started off way behind.
This process is repeated when looking at possible promotions at every level until the field is so distorted that it no longer represents any kind of fairness.
As far as I am concerned what we achieve in life should be directly proportionate to the amount of work we put in. If we run harder and faster than everyone else I the pack then the lion shouldn’t be able to attack us.
Yet, in South Africa, a supposed democracy, this is not the case. Equal is only equal if those who were disadvantaged in the past are given preference now. So next time you’re sitting at the bank with your bank manager and she is being incompetent, remember that her degree is the same as everyone else’s and that she truly is just INCOMPETENT! Please go complain to her boss.
And remember that her race has absolutely nothing to do with her ability to be a bank manager!
Thursday, 31 May 2012
Wednesday, 30 May 2012
Exams: Motivation ZERO
It seems as if somewhere in the midst of exams every student on campus has gone slightly psycho. This was most evident this evening as I sat in The Bib (library) trying to study when a crowd of about 200 rowdy boys came running through the library wearing every possible outfit imaginable, shouting and just generally being as noisy as possible. The commotion lasted about ten minutes and can be viewed here:
This got me thinking about the effects exams have on our lives. We spend about a month stuck in a small, over crowded, overheated room staring at books full of mostly irrelevant information. Despite the fact that these rooms are over crowded we find ourselves completely isolated from our friends and the outside world. We come up with every possible form of procrastination in the hopes of distracting ourselves from the inevitable – studying.
Once our flats are spotless, we’ve been to the gym, phoned granny and taken up a couple extra hobbies we eventually run out of ideas. Out of pure boredom and fear we begin studying. Now, irrespective of whether we enjoy the subject or not we find ourselves wishing, hoping and maybe even praying for exams to end.
Then, one morning, you wake up and it’s suddenly exam day. You have at least half a nervous breakdown and run around screaming for half an hour. When you eventually calm down you start cramming your brain full of facts that you hope will be in the exam. At this point, time is flying by and going backwards all at the same time. Your brain is confused as to whether it wants to get the exam over and done with or whether it would like more time to cram.
You find yourself sitting in an exam room surrounded by the people you know and love except you don’t want to talk to them for fear of causing any more unnecessary panic nor let on the fact that you clearly aren’t ready to right. Last minute panic sets in and you find yourself wondering whether you should just attempt second opportunity or not.
If you do decide to stay, then you watch as the examiner hands out the paper. The people who know what they’re doing look through the paper nodding their heads and highlighting particular questions that they know will be easy. The rest of you sit there starring at the pages waiting for something to happen. You look at the clock and somewhere in the back of your mind you hear the examiner say you may begin writing.
You instantly know that you’ve made the wrong decision. You should have run away while it was still a possibility but now it’s too late and you find yourself making things up and attempting to copy from the person in front of you who is probably just as clueless as you are. Eventually you get to the point where you actually cannot possibly come up with anymore stuff to write down, you give up and walk out.
You know immediately that you’re not going to do well but you hope for the best. And then the stress really begins as you wait for your results. Unsure about whether you’ll be able to write the second opportunity or not, because you know for a fact that you didn’t pass.
It drives us completely insane!! Exams have an unrelenting way of working on your nerves and sleeping patterns to the point where you think you might just collapse. But eventually when it’s all over, you head home for your holiday, grateful that it’s all over and done with and that you know have sometime to recover with your family and friends safe in the knowledge that there is nothing more that can be done. It is out of your hands and there is no way of changing anything.
So while you’re all sitting there studying, put your minds at ease with the realization that exams do eventually pass and sometime in the future you shall return to the big, wide world as a fully functional person. In the meantime however, stop reading my blog as a form of procrastination and go study…
This got me thinking about the effects exams have on our lives. We spend about a month stuck in a small, over crowded, overheated room staring at books full of mostly irrelevant information. Despite the fact that these rooms are over crowded we find ourselves completely isolated from our friends and the outside world. We come up with every possible form of procrastination in the hopes of distracting ourselves from the inevitable – studying.
Once our flats are spotless, we’ve been to the gym, phoned granny and taken up a couple extra hobbies we eventually run out of ideas. Out of pure boredom and fear we begin studying. Now, irrespective of whether we enjoy the subject or not we find ourselves wishing, hoping and maybe even praying for exams to end.
Then, one morning, you wake up and it’s suddenly exam day. You have at least half a nervous breakdown and run around screaming for half an hour. When you eventually calm down you start cramming your brain full of facts that you hope will be in the exam. At this point, time is flying by and going backwards all at the same time. Your brain is confused as to whether it wants to get the exam over and done with or whether it would like more time to cram.
You find yourself sitting in an exam room surrounded by the people you know and love except you don’t want to talk to them for fear of causing any more unnecessary panic nor let on the fact that you clearly aren’t ready to right. Last minute panic sets in and you find yourself wondering whether you should just attempt second opportunity or not.
If you do decide to stay, then you watch as the examiner hands out the paper. The people who know what they’re doing look through the paper nodding their heads and highlighting particular questions that they know will be easy. The rest of you sit there starring at the pages waiting for something to happen. You look at the clock and somewhere in the back of your mind you hear the examiner say you may begin writing.
You instantly know that you’ve made the wrong decision. You should have run away while it was still a possibility but now it’s too late and you find yourself making things up and attempting to copy from the person in front of you who is probably just as clueless as you are. Eventually you get to the point where you actually cannot possibly come up with anymore stuff to write down, you give up and walk out.
You know immediately that you’re not going to do well but you hope for the best. And then the stress really begins as you wait for your results. Unsure about whether you’ll be able to write the second opportunity or not, because you know for a fact that you didn’t pass.
It drives us completely insane!! Exams have an unrelenting way of working on your nerves and sleeping patterns to the point where you think you might just collapse. But eventually when it’s all over, you head home for your holiday, grateful that it’s all over and done with and that you know have sometime to recover with your family and friends safe in the knowledge that there is nothing more that can be done. It is out of your hands and there is no way of changing anything.
So while you’re all sitting there studying, put your minds at ease with the realization that exams do eventually pass and sometime in the future you shall return to the big, wide world as a fully functional person. In the meantime however, stop reading my blog as a form of procrastination and go study…
Tuesday, 29 May 2012
It'll be a Breeze
As a student, you quickly learn that the general idea that university is going to be easy, is completely wrong. You've heard all these amazing stories from family and friends about how relaxed it is and how you never really have to work. So you get to university with this illusion that you're going to pass with flying colours and be out of there in three years.
Well, it's a lie. The people who tell you university is easy are wither studying a BA or never got a degree. It really isn't easy at all. You actually have to attend class for fear of falling behind. You have assignments flying at you from left, right and centre.The worst part is that you have now got this amazing social life and you have to walk away from it...
Or maybe that's just my veiw?
I am a second year BSc student at Stellenbosch University and I find myself looking for time so that I can sleep. I spent the whole of first year making sure I had an amazing social calander and that I had loads of friends to spend my time with because, as far as I knew, that was as difficult as it was going to get!
And then I started second year.
Ok, I have had a bit of a rough personal life this year but all things considered, I just don't have time. I find myself choosing studying over SCUBA diving, being with my friends, playing music and partying. I find myself in classes at eight in the morning when I know all the first years are still nice and warm in bed. And the worst part about it is that now that it's exams, you'd think the work would be easier because I did so much work during the semester. Well, I was wrong. I find myself wading through a never ending pit of nucleotides and epidermal tissue.
And I at this rate I am swimming backwards!!
So yes, University is amazing, as long as you don't mind failing.
Well, it's a lie. The people who tell you university is easy are wither studying a BA or never got a degree. It really isn't easy at all. You actually have to attend class for fear of falling behind. You have assignments flying at you from left, right and centre.The worst part is that you have now got this amazing social life and you have to walk away from it...
Or maybe that's just my veiw?
I am a second year BSc student at Stellenbosch University and I find myself looking for time so that I can sleep. I spent the whole of first year making sure I had an amazing social calander and that I had loads of friends to spend my time with because, as far as I knew, that was as difficult as it was going to get!
And then I started second year.
Ok, I have had a bit of a rough personal life this year but all things considered, I just don't have time. I find myself choosing studying over SCUBA diving, being with my friends, playing music and partying. I find myself in classes at eight in the morning when I know all the first years are still nice and warm in bed. And the worst part about it is that now that it's exams, you'd think the work would be easier because I did so much work during the semester. Well, I was wrong. I find myself wading through a never ending pit of nucleotides and epidermal tissue.
And I at this rate I am swimming backwards!!
So yes, University is amazing, as long as you don't mind failing.
Monday, 28 May 2012
Goodbyes
Being away from the people we love is one of the most difficult things to face in our lives. Sometimes we can't be with those people because they've passed away and others its because they've moved away. If we're lucky then they are only leaving for a short while. It is easier to say "goodbye for now" than it is to say "goodbye."
This year has held many goodbyes for me. Some of them were only for now, but two very important people left my life this year.
The first is my ex boyfriend. Now usually, relationships end because something happened and the relationship no longer works, however in this case the relationship ended purely because he was moving away. The problem with relationships ending in this way is that you have no reason to want to get over the person. In fact, in my case, I didn't want to move on, but you have too. You don't have an option. It's difficult.
The second was my dad. Boy's need their dad's so that they have someone to teach them the ways of life and have someone to look up to. Girl's need their dad's to protect them. Dad's are the barriers we have between reality and our easily broken hearts. They give us the advice we need for life and love. Most importantly they are their to hold your hand when you cross the street.
My dad and I were never very close. I loved him, but we didn't have much of a relationship. Or so I thought at the time. I didn't realize how much he meant to me until he was't there anymore and suddenly when something was wrong I had no one to call. The thing protecting me from "the real world" was gone. My life changed in an instant.
I guess we always know that eventually we're going to have to say goodbye but, as far as I was concerned, my dad was indestructable! He was my hero. Nothing could touch him. He truly was an amazing man. He was much more impressive than most men and was respected by many. I thought he was invincible.
When I realized he wasn't it broke my heart. I was in shock. And I had no idea how I was going to survive.
Four months later and I'm still alive. I miss him every day, but I'm alive. I have had the most amazing support from family and friends. It is still horrible to think about and hurts more than I knew possible. The thing about goodbyes is that sometimes, you don't even get to say them. Make sure you always say exactly what you need to because there will come a time when you won't be able to anymore.
This year has held many goodbyes for me. Some of them were only for now, but two very important people left my life this year.
The first is my ex boyfriend. Now usually, relationships end because something happened and the relationship no longer works, however in this case the relationship ended purely because he was moving away. The problem with relationships ending in this way is that you have no reason to want to get over the person. In fact, in my case, I didn't want to move on, but you have too. You don't have an option. It's difficult.
The second was my dad. Boy's need their dad's so that they have someone to teach them the ways of life and have someone to look up to. Girl's need their dad's to protect them. Dad's are the barriers we have between reality and our easily broken hearts. They give us the advice we need for life and love. Most importantly they are their to hold your hand when you cross the street.
My dad and I were never very close. I loved him, but we didn't have much of a relationship. Or so I thought at the time. I didn't realize how much he meant to me until he was't there anymore and suddenly when something was wrong I had no one to call. The thing protecting me from "the real world" was gone. My life changed in an instant.
I guess we always know that eventually we're going to have to say goodbye but, as far as I was concerned, my dad was indestructable! He was my hero. Nothing could touch him. He truly was an amazing man. He was much more impressive than most men and was respected by many. I thought he was invincible.
When I realized he wasn't it broke my heart. I was in shock. And I had no idea how I was going to survive.
Four months later and I'm still alive. I miss him every day, but I'm alive. I have had the most amazing support from family and friends. It is still horrible to think about and hurts more than I knew possible. The thing about goodbyes is that sometimes, you don't even get to say them. Make sure you always say exactly what you need to because there will come a time when you won't be able to anymore.
Democracy? Where??
One of the greatest insults to our democracy was thrown out in this last week, and no, I am not referring to "The Spear" but rather to the insults that came in the aftermath. Perhaps the biggest insult to our democracy went relatively unnoticed in comparison to the uproar created by the painting.
I am speaking about the City Press ordeal. Not only were the employees insulted and threatened but the ANC called for a national boycott of their newspaper. Need I remind you that the last time boycott’s plagued our country due to Freedom of Speech we were in the middle of trying to rid our country of a massively unjust political regime
Now please tell me how it took us seventeen years to go full circle?
How can a political party that used to fight for the Freedom of Speech change their values so drastically that they are now the oppressors of that very concept? I tell you this is the beginning of a very sad realization.
The worst part about it is that it went relatively unnoticed. There was such a huge uproar about a stupid painting and virtually no reaction to the fact that the ANC, our LEADING political party has come to represent the very worst part about the Apartheid Regime.
It saddens me that our government has come to the point where they truly believe that their people should respect them merely out of position. “People should not be afraid of their governments; Governments should be afraid of their people” (V for Vendetta, 2005).
In most countries the governments beg for the approval of their people, and should they not get it they work harder. In South Africa the government demands respect and should someone over step a minor boundary, the government goes crazy and ends up boycotting a major newspaper.
Now, I am all for boycotting! It is a very efficient way of getting your point across but it has to be for just reasons and I’m afraid that this reason is just largely obscure. City Press happens to have a picture of a painting done by a satirical artist on their website. Sounds like every other newspaper in the world to me!
I worry that this is a major step backwards, and that this time we may not recover it.
I am speaking about the City Press ordeal. Not only were the employees insulted and threatened but the ANC called for a national boycott of their newspaper. Need I remind you that the last time boycott’s plagued our country due to Freedom of Speech we were in the middle of trying to rid our country of a massively unjust political regime
Now please tell me how it took us seventeen years to go full circle?
How can a political party that used to fight for the Freedom of Speech change their values so drastically that they are now the oppressors of that very concept? I tell you this is the beginning of a very sad realization.
The worst part about it is that it went relatively unnoticed. There was such a huge uproar about a stupid painting and virtually no reaction to the fact that the ANC, our LEADING political party has come to represent the very worst part about the Apartheid Regime.
It saddens me that our government has come to the point where they truly believe that their people should respect them merely out of position. “People should not be afraid of their governments; Governments should be afraid of their people” (V for Vendetta, 2005).
In most countries the governments beg for the approval of their people, and should they not get it they work harder. In South Africa the government demands respect and should someone over step a minor boundary, the government goes crazy and ends up boycotting a major newspaper.
Now, I am all for boycotting! It is a very efficient way of getting your point across but it has to be for just reasons and I’m afraid that this reason is just largely obscure. City Press happens to have a picture of a painting done by a satirical artist on their website. Sounds like every other newspaper in the world to me!
I worry that this is a major step backwards, and that this time we may not recover it.
Friday, 25 May 2012
It's Kak Living in Paradise
That's it! I give up. I have now officially had enough. I have tried time and time again to understand the concept of land claims and land reform and all but truth be told it just angers me. Yes, I know that during Apartheid land was unfairly taken from blacks and other races but since that time a lot of the farms have changed hand a couple times and the person who currently calls that farm home legally owns that land.
And when someone comes along and tells you that your land and your home actually belongs to someone else and that you have to move, it is just downright frustrating. I try to be understanding, I really do.
BUT NOW, I find out that the government actually has no idea how much of the agricultural land is currently owned by different racial groups! We've been told that the reason government has been handing out land to the "previously disadvantaged" is because they still own a minority share. Actually, they have no clue who owns what share and will continue handing out land to people who have no will or intention to make that land successful!
Maybe I am generalizing here, but I come from Carolina, a small town in the Highveld, Mpumalanga and in the years that my family has been farming there we have watched many successful farmers leave the area only to be replaced by someone who doesn't really know much about farming, nor does he have any intention of learning how to farm because lets face it, when something is handed to you on a silver platter you take it for granted! I have watched the most amazingly beautiful farms slowly decline until they are virtually irreparable.
I am NOT a racist. I’m not against land being owned by blacks, I am against people who are given something they don’t really want (so that they can be classified as having a home and a job! Must keep the statisticians happy) who then take it for granted and then let it fall into disrepair.
I know many successful black and coloured farmers as well, don't get me wrong, they know what they're doing. But the successful ones are those that actually bought the land and had life long dreams of becoming farmers. They had aspirations for the land. And most of all they respected the responsibilities that come with farming and a farming community.
Being a farmer is not just about making sure that your farm is successful but rather a community thing. When there is stock theft in the area all the farmers in the area need to be notified so that firstly, they can check that all their livestock is there, secondly so that they can check if someone else’s livestock has not become mixed up with their own and lastly so that they know to be extra careful in the near future. If there is a fire in the area it is everyone’s responsibility to stop it before it gets to your own land.
However, when there are farmers in the area that really don’t care it affects the whole community! And this is what makes me so mad. People who don’t work for what they get take it for granted and don’t understand their place in the greater circle of life.
In life you have to work for what you want. You’ll work for the things that you really want and when you finally do get what you want the government will come in, chase you away and give all your hard work to someone who will throw it all away. Welcome to South Africa!
SA Politics - Pure Magic
The best magicians are those that have mastered the art of deception. They are professionals at making you see only what they want you too see. Sure, there are those musicians who use very cool gadgets that do all the work for them, but lets face it, the only magic tricks we really enjoy are those that we can't possible even begin to figure out which are generally those that involve more skill!
A couple years ago when I was in London I was lucky enough to speak to a magician. Now, I have no clue whether he is a very good magician or not, but he informed me that the trick to being a magician is being able to make people focus on one hand while the other hand sneakily conjours up "magic."
Pure slight of hand...
This is why the idea of a semi-naked assistant works so well. It keeps your eyes focused on one thing when actually the real magic trick is happening somewhere else.
Now, call me crazy, but isn't that exactly what is happening in South African politics? I hate to bring up "The Spear" again (I know we're all getting sick of it) but it is such a classic example of South African magic. It has caused a major public outcry with two main opponents. One group believing that it the painting is a good representation of our president and believe that he had it coming, after all a man who has more wives at one time than any "normal" man could have in his entire life, a man who has been accused publicly of rape and a man who has admitted to knowingly having unprotected sex with an HIV positive woman deserves to be depicted as a "philandering womanizer."
The other group believes that it is highly indecent and unjust. This group believes that no matter what our president does in his personal life, he is still our leader and should be treated with a certain level of respect and dignity.
And South Africans are a HIGHLY passionate nation. When we truly believe in something we ensure that everybody knows where we stand on the topic. And what better way than to create a distraction than to add a rather controversial topic to a society that is just waiting to explode. Because South Africa is a ticking bomb. We are looking for something to take our frustrations out on and jump at any possible opportunity!
Think about it, a rather average painting dipicting our president in a negative way? It happens at least once a month! When was the last time you saw a Zapiro cartoon of the president that didn't depict him in a negative light? So really, is this topic that big a deal?
Well, no, it wouldn't have been if the ANC hadn't cause such a big fuss about it.
And one has to ask why they did it? My theory is that while we were all worrying about some painting there was something far more sinister going on in the other hand. And I'm affraid to say is, but we fell for it hook, line and sinker!
However, it did help, because now that we've blown off a bit of steam we won't have to worry about that bomb expolding for some time still. I just have a feeling that we (the youth of today) are going to have to clean up the mess once it does explode.
So, for now atleast, the masses are calm. We have eaten our cake and we have seen our circus and now it is time to sleep. Until morning the government can go back to stealing and raping our country for all that it's worth.
A couple years ago when I was in London I was lucky enough to speak to a magician. Now, I have no clue whether he is a very good magician or not, but he informed me that the trick to being a magician is being able to make people focus on one hand while the other hand sneakily conjours up "magic."
Pure slight of hand...
This is why the idea of a semi-naked assistant works so well. It keeps your eyes focused on one thing when actually the real magic trick is happening somewhere else.
Now, call me crazy, but isn't that exactly what is happening in South African politics? I hate to bring up "The Spear" again (I know we're all getting sick of it) but it is such a classic example of South African magic. It has caused a major public outcry with two main opponents. One group believing that it the painting is a good representation of our president and believe that he had it coming, after all a man who has more wives at one time than any "normal" man could have in his entire life, a man who has been accused publicly of rape and a man who has admitted to knowingly having unprotected sex with an HIV positive woman deserves to be depicted as a "philandering womanizer."
The other group believes that it is highly indecent and unjust. This group believes that no matter what our president does in his personal life, he is still our leader and should be treated with a certain level of respect and dignity.
And South Africans are a HIGHLY passionate nation. When we truly believe in something we ensure that everybody knows where we stand on the topic. And what better way than to create a distraction than to add a rather controversial topic to a society that is just waiting to explode. Because South Africa is a ticking bomb. We are looking for something to take our frustrations out on and jump at any possible opportunity!
Think about it, a rather average painting dipicting our president in a negative way? It happens at least once a month! When was the last time you saw a Zapiro cartoon of the president that didn't depict him in a negative light? So really, is this topic that big a deal?
Well, no, it wouldn't have been if the ANC hadn't cause such a big fuss about it.
And one has to ask why they did it? My theory is that while we were all worrying about some painting there was something far more sinister going on in the other hand. And I'm affraid to say is, but we fell for it hook, line and sinker!
However, it did help, because now that we've blown off a bit of steam we won't have to worry about that bomb expolding for some time still. I just have a feeling that we (the youth of today) are going to have to clean up the mess once it does explode.
So, for now atleast, the masses are calm. We have eaten our cake and we have seen our circus and now it is time to sleep. Until morning the government can go back to stealing and raping our country for all that it's worth.
Thursday, 24 May 2012
If Only I Could Think Straight
Ever gone through that period when you really like someone but you have no idea whether that person feels the same about you?
I find myself sitting here, when I should be studying, thinking about men and the effect they have on us girls. The tears they cause and the smiles that they bring. And every now and again they help us put our lives back together and patch up all the scars.
I am young. And I may be very naive. But I have had my fair share of heartbreaks and what I believe to be love. And every single time there has been that short while at the start when you can't be sure how the other person feels and you find yourself obsessing about it. You over-analyze everything that was said and done when you last saw them. You try to read their minds and understand what their intentions are.
And yes, maybe you facebook stalk them in the hopes of gaining some more information.
But lets face it, WE ARE CLUELESS!!!
No matter how hard we try to climb into their heads we will just never understand... untill THAT moment. Now that moment can either make your day or break your heart but either way you are going to remember THAT moment forever! Most of the time, it's good news. It's that moment that makes your stomach turn and gives you butterflies for months after. But every now and again, our greatest fear is realized, and we find ourselves sitting on our beds wondering what we did wrong.
And this is the problem, because we smother ourselves in self hate. We start imagining fat that we never had, finding faults that don't exist. That tiny pimple on your chin is suddenly the end of the world! Desperate to find something or someone to blame. When actually it comes down to this very simple problem:
I find myself sitting here, when I should be studying, thinking about men and the effect they have on us girls. The tears they cause and the smiles that they bring. And every now and again they help us put our lives back together and patch up all the scars.
I am young. And I may be very naive. But I have had my fair share of heartbreaks and what I believe to be love. And every single time there has been that short while at the start when you can't be sure how the other person feels and you find yourself obsessing about it. You over-analyze everything that was said and done when you last saw them. You try to read their minds and understand what their intentions are.
And yes, maybe you facebook stalk them in the hopes of gaining some more information.
But lets face it, WE ARE CLUELESS!!!
No matter how hard we try to climb into their heads we will just never understand... untill THAT moment. Now that moment can either make your day or break your heart but either way you are going to remember THAT moment forever! Most of the time, it's good news. It's that moment that makes your stomach turn and gives you butterflies for months after. But every now and again, our greatest fear is realized, and we find ourselves sitting on our beds wondering what we did wrong.
And this is the problem, because we smother ourselves in self hate. We start imagining fat that we never had, finding faults that don't exist. That tiny pimple on your chin is suddenly the end of the world! Desperate to find something or someone to blame. When actually it comes down to this very simple problem:
You are perfect
You're just not perfect for him!
So stop all this self hate. Pick yourself up, wipe off the dirt and make sure you're in the right frame of mind because when he does come along he will be worth every fall. And don't you dare settle for anything less.
My friends are probably the most important aspect of my life second only too my family. There are some friends that can just never be replaced. i always think of this quote from a song by Baz Luhrman:
"Friends come and go
But with a precious few
We should hold on."
And it is so true. I went to school in a small town in Mpumalanga, but currently am at varsity in Stellenbosch in the Western Cape. Essentially I am 1600 km away from there. And to make matters worse I was at boarding school and half of my friend were from different countries. The gap in geography made it quite difficult to keep in touch.
But the few, very important friends always made the effort to keep in contact no matter how far away! In fact the two people I speak to most often from school both live in other countries, one in Swaziland and the other in Botswana. It is at times like this that you realize who your true friends really are, because only the very special ones will continue to make an effort to keep in contact.
Then at the beginning of this year, tragedy struck, and my father passed away. Two weeks later, my then boyfriend left for a different city and we had to call it off. Since then three of our dogs have died, we were broken into, my one friend's dad passed away, another friend's mom passed away and yet another friend's granddad passed away. To say that this year has been a rough year is a gross under statement!
I'm not sharing this because I want pity. I am sharing this because all of this has taught me a very important lesson! Because three and a half months later my "best friend" from school still doesn't even know that my dad passed away!
Every now and again life will give you hell, but it is at times like these when we realize the true value of family and friends and we begin to appreciate them more than we ever did before!
And God Forbid you mess with my friends!!
Wednesday, 23 May 2012
Inspiration
Where do you find true inspiration? A lyric to your favourite song? Your best friend? A picture?
I find myself looking at the world through a sepia filter and when I am truly inspired I see true colour. Sometimes it is in a picture:
What ever it is for you, Surround yourself in it! It'll be worth your while.
I find myself looking at the world through a sepia filter and when I am truly inspired I see true colour. Sometimes it is in a picture:
Sometimes it is in a lyric:
"The world is spinning way too fast.
The entire human race, will float into space.
So fill your shoes with cement,
And kiss the ones you love,
With reckless abandonment." - The Spill Canvas
The entire human race, will float into space.
So fill your shoes with cement,
And kiss the ones you love,
With reckless abandonment." - The Spill Canvas
What ever it is for you, Surround yourself in it! It'll be worth your while.
Crush
I don't know what to think anymore. I go out and I'm enjoying the time I have with my friends when I see you accross the room. I wave, you smile and I go back to dancing. Next thing I know you're by my side and we're partying the night away - together!
We all end up at the flat and you spill your heart to me. You tell me how you feel. And I agree.
Then when I wake up in the morning, the booze has worn off and we're just two people with no story.
You don't understand what you're doing to me. you're pulling me apart. I don't know how you feel. I've never been this lost. Tell me how you feel. Tell me what you want!
Please?
We all end up at the flat and you spill your heart to me. You tell me how you feel. And I agree.
Then when I wake up in the morning, the booze has worn off and we're just two people with no story.
You don't understand what you're doing to me. you're pulling me apart. I don't know how you feel. I've never been this lost. Tell me how you feel. Tell me what you want!
Please?
Tuesday, 22 May 2012
Music - The Soundtrack to My Life
Music is my home. It is the place where I feel safe, inspired and totally free. I write music. I play music. I listen to music. My entire life is to the melody of my latest trend.
Lately, I find myself looking for new music everywhere I go. I hear new sounds and I get excited. Its what keeps me going. And that moment when you find a song and you know from the very beginning that this is the song. This musician has written this song for you. Its lyrics talk to your heart and the gentle rocking of the piano or the hardcore slide of the guitar feels like home. It determines your mood, your day and your actions.
Never forget the music, because it will take you through life. Make sure your song is worth listening too.
Lately, I find myself looking for new music everywhere I go. I hear new sounds and I get excited. Its what keeps me going. And that moment when you find a song and you know from the very beginning that this is the song. This musician has written this song for you. Its lyrics talk to your heart and the gentle rocking of the piano or the hardcore slide of the guitar feels like home. It determines your mood, your day and your actions.
Never forget the music, because it will take you through life. Make sure your song is worth listening too.
Our President
On the 22nd of May I posted a piece called "Revenge of an Era" about how I believed in South Africa and its prospects for the future. Then I saw this Portrait of our current president Jacob Zuma done by Brett Murray.
Brett Murray was then quoted by News24 as saying it was "an attempt at humorous satire of political power and patriarchy within the context of other artworks in the exhibition and within the broader context of South African discourse."
The president as well as the ANC (political party) were up in arms about the portrait and declared it racist. Racist? How on earth is it racist?
As with all breaking political news in South Africa, Zapiro (a South African Cartoonist) responded with these two cartoons.
I realized then that South Africa cannot be expected to excel in the world when this is how our leader is viewed! I am not his greatest fan, but I always assumed he had supporters as he was voted in by the majority of South Africans. It is at times like these when one notices that there are a lot of South Africans who view our president as a "philandering womaniser" and not as a well educated man with integrity and a high morale.
So why, may I ask, did you vote for him?
Brett Murray was then quoted by News24 as saying it was "an attempt at humorous satire of political power and patriarchy within the context of other artworks in the exhibition and within the broader context of South African discourse."
The president as well as the ANC (political party) were up in arms about the portrait and declared it racist. Racist? How on earth is it racist?
As with all breaking political news in South Africa, Zapiro (a South African Cartoonist) responded with these two cartoons.
I realized then that South Africa cannot be expected to excel in the world when this is how our leader is viewed! I am not his greatest fan, but I always assumed he had supporters as he was voted in by the majority of South Africans. It is at times like these when one notices that there are a lot of South Africans who view our president as a "philandering womaniser" and not as a well educated man with integrity and a high morale.
So why, may I ask, did you vote for him?
Family
No one gets to choose their family. Before you're born you are not asked to choose your parents out of a catalogue. You don't get to Facebook stalk them and check whether or not they are complete psychos or not.
However, I think I was pretty lucky. Yes, they are in fact completely psychotic, but thank goodness for that otherwise I would be lost!
Family is a very important concept to me, especially over birthdays or family holidays. The problem is that I currently live appoxiamately 1600 km away from home and I am starting to miss out on all the family time. So, just incase I'm not jealous enough already, they ensure that they tell me whenever they are doing something super cool and they make sure that they tell me just how AMAZING it really was. None of them ever seems to feel that it would have been better if I had been there...
Well, except for my siblings. Usually siglings come from a completely different planet to ours and they irritate us to the point of insanity. That said, I have pretty awesome siblings! My sister is a couple years younger and my best friend. I would be lost without that child, and next year we shall finally be reunited once more in the beautiful town of Stellenbosch. But that is another story, for another time. My other sibling is a much younger half brother - the perfect recipe for disaster. Except I was given one of those really cool little guys, who is cute and cuddly and actually picks up a pen every once in a while to write and POST me a letter.
POST - that completely foreign concept to most people in our generation. It's that thing where you write (on paper) a letter and then dig in some forgotten draw for an envelope, pray for a stamp to fall out of the sky and then realize you don't know that person's address. When you eventually send the damn letter you have to wait a week (Yes, a full week, if not a month. Welcome to South Africa) for that person to recieve it!!!
Anyway, the point is that I get super excited when I get these letters because it reminds me that my little bro thinks I am THE bees knees and will do nearly anything to keep in contact with me because he actually misses me. And then I burst in to tears because I miss him, and he's cute and I want to go home!!
The point of this little rant is that I find myself at the end of a hectic semester, where karma took a bite out of me at every possible moment, and I am homesick. I have been away from home for long periods of time (boarding school) since the age of six and have never been this homesick.
This is all due to the fact that I really do love my family and would not have chosen a better one for myself. My parents knew what they were doing and made three (including myself) awesome kids! And if given the choice now, I would stick with them.
However, I think I was pretty lucky. Yes, they are in fact completely psychotic, but thank goodness for that otherwise I would be lost!
Family is a very important concept to me, especially over birthdays or family holidays. The problem is that I currently live appoxiamately 1600 km away from home and I am starting to miss out on all the family time. So, just incase I'm not jealous enough already, they ensure that they tell me whenever they are doing something super cool and they make sure that they tell me just how AMAZING it really was. None of them ever seems to feel that it would have been better if I had been there...
Well, except for my siblings. Usually siglings come from a completely different planet to ours and they irritate us to the point of insanity. That said, I have pretty awesome siblings! My sister is a couple years younger and my best friend. I would be lost without that child, and next year we shall finally be reunited once more in the beautiful town of Stellenbosch. But that is another story, for another time. My other sibling is a much younger half brother - the perfect recipe for disaster. Except I was given one of those really cool little guys, who is cute and cuddly and actually picks up a pen every once in a while to write and POST me a letter.
POST - that completely foreign concept to most people in our generation. It's that thing where you write (on paper) a letter and then dig in some forgotten draw for an envelope, pray for a stamp to fall out of the sky and then realize you don't know that person's address. When you eventually send the damn letter you have to wait a week (Yes, a full week, if not a month. Welcome to South Africa) for that person to recieve it!!!
Anyway, the point is that I get super excited when I get these letters because it reminds me that my little bro thinks I am THE bees knees and will do nearly anything to keep in contact with me because he actually misses me. And then I burst in to tears because I miss him, and he's cute and I want to go home!!
The point of this little rant is that I find myself at the end of a hectic semester, where karma took a bite out of me at every possible moment, and I am homesick. I have been away from home for long periods of time (boarding school) since the age of six and have never been this homesick.
This is all due to the fact that I really do love my family and would not have chosen a better one for myself. My parents knew what they were doing and made three (including myself) awesome kids! And if given the choice now, I would stick with them.
Monday, 21 May 2012
Revenge of an Era
Revenge of an Era
I am told what to do
Ordered! Instructed!
I am the slave
Of a government
Lost to sour revenge
I must employ people
Due to race and gender
Where ability is not considered
And hard work
Is not a quality trait
I must hope
To hold on to my land
Which my money bought
From cultural thieves
Yet it is my home
I must be still
For fear of upsetting
An unjustly treated race
From an era
Long before mine
I must fight
To douse a fire
Lit many years
Before my time
Justice is but a scornful woman with me
Katherine McGinn
As a proud South African I have been wondering a lot about our politics lately and actually I've come to the conclusion that the rest of the world is completely oblivious to what it is really like here. We live in a beautiful land with amazing people and cultures and a vibrant array of talents. On paper we are probably one of the best out there and yet I find myself wondering why so many still live in squalor.
I think I have the answer; most of the youth was never directly affected by apartheid and yet, daily we pay the price for it. The majority of our population doesn't attend a proper school because our government is so busy worrying about their revenge or compensation, as they call it, for a highly unjust system.
Now, let me just state, I am highly against the apartheid regime!!!
However it has been many years now and I think it is time for South Africa to stop throwing a tantrum about being unfairly treated and worry about standing up, wiping off the dirt and becoming the beautiful nation it could be.
I truly do believe that if we start implementing all our well written legislation that we might actually start moving forward.
My Wall is Orange because I Painted it Purple
You get to a stage in your life where everyone is asking you "What do you want to do oneday?"
Well, I've hit it and worst of all is that for the, first time in my life, I am more confused than ever. I know exactly what I want to do with my life, however my current path is rather... unusual. Society tells me I need a degree so I am sitting here, studying a BSc which I am pretty sure I have no intention of ever using. However, I do it without much complaint. After all my father, who's given me every possible opportunity to succeed in life, wants his oldest daughter to have a degree. The plan is too get it over and done with as soon as possible, so that I can start my "real life."
At the moment I find myself swimming in purple paint, when actually I'm just swimming through it so that I can get to the Orange paint.
At the end of it all, you'll only ever get too the orange paint if you start swimming!
Well, I've hit it and worst of all is that for the, first time in my life, I am more confused than ever. I know exactly what I want to do with my life, however my current path is rather... unusual. Society tells me I need a degree so I am sitting here, studying a BSc which I am pretty sure I have no intention of ever using. However, I do it without much complaint. After all my father, who's given me every possible opportunity to succeed in life, wants his oldest daughter to have a degree. The plan is too get it over and done with as soon as possible, so that I can start my "real life."
At the moment I find myself swimming in purple paint, when actually I'm just swimming through it so that I can get to the Orange paint.
At the end of it all, you'll only ever get too the orange paint if you start swimming!
Sunday, 20 May 2012
Recovery
So I have learnt a couple lessons this year. The first is this, the sooner you get over a broken relationship, the sooner you will realize that you deserve more. This to me seemed like a pretty obvious statement until I gave it some serious thought...
You see the problem is that even years after a relationship I find myself wondering, what if things had gone differently? What if we tried again now? Should I have given him a second chance?? The answers are irrelevant, the problem is that I am actually asking these questions when really I shouldn't be.
A relationship that has ended, ended for a reason, yes? If he cheated on you once, he'll do it again. If he left you stranded, he'll do it again. If his mother hated you, she hasn’t changed her mind! It all comes down to one rather harsh reality; People DO NOT change.
So here comes the epiphany; a song’s ending does not change just because you play it in a different key. The ending may sound slightly different, but it is still the same melody!
The sooner we realize that we can’t change the past the sooner we can realize that what matters, is right now.
You see the problem is that even years after a relationship I find myself wondering, what if things had gone differently? What if we tried again now? Should I have given him a second chance?? The answers are irrelevant, the problem is that I am actually asking these questions when really I shouldn't be.
A relationship that has ended, ended for a reason, yes? If he cheated on you once, he'll do it again. If he left you stranded, he'll do it again. If his mother hated you, she hasn’t changed her mind! It all comes down to one rather harsh reality; People DO NOT change.
So here comes the epiphany; a song’s ending does not change just because you play it in a different key. The ending may sound slightly different, but it is still the same melody!
The sooner we realize that we can’t change the past the sooner we can realize that what matters, is right now.
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